A Real Pain in the Neck

In the "gothicy" vampire stories I've read (sorry, not familiar with urban vampire tales), the victim is generally not conscious when the vampire does its biting. In Bryony, however, Melissa is awake and alert for the deed, so I wanted to accurately describe the experience.

Now, I've never been bitten by a vampire (not that I remember, anyway), but I've had two fine needle aspiration thyroid biopsies over the years. My neck was titled upward and held immobile. One stinging needle delivered the anesthetic; a second jabbed in and around the area searching for cells. I could feel strange sensations from my neck to my toes.

In Bryony, Melissa learns that different vampires, like the technicians that biopsied me, have different biting "styles," ranging from mild to violent. The man who conducted my first biopsy politely jabbed me seven different times, then I waited while he ran the speciman to pathology. During my second biopsy several years later, that technician rammed that needle all around the lobe, ran it to pathology, and called it good.

Before the month is up, I'll be having surgery to remove, at the very least, the left lobe of my thyroid gland. I'm wondering if a vampire attack might be more pleasant. I'll let you know.

Denise Unland