Mom Moments

A lot of this weekend was work.

Some work always runs into the weekend, and, in this case, I have a son scheduled for surgery on Wednesday, so some of it was working ahead.

And then it got a little busier.

Timothy was preparing for a nine-day business trip. This included flying several hours to another state early Sunday morning to launch new products at a trade show and then flying to several hours Tuesday morning to another state for nearly a week of professional development.

Early Sunday morning, (1-ish) I woke up feeling something was off. And then I fell back to sleep. Repeat two hours later, and suddenly I was wide awake.

Timothy was sick with what appeared to be a stomach bug. Except he was REALLY sick and missing this trip was not an option.

I should add here that on his father's side of the family, we have A LOT od appendicitis. His father nearly died from it; and his father's uncle did. One of Timothy's uncle's had it, and so did both of his children as adults, with one very recently. Because of this "appendicitis" quickly comes to mind.

I spent the next hour researching various options (work, travel, medical) for him while he just got sicker (sick enough that he doesn't remember the experience, and we almost called an ambulance) and other options vanished.

I woke up the next in line from his company to alert her of the situation. Rebekah changed his flight to later in the day (just in case). We got him dressed; Rebekah and his girl friend Jasmine took him to the ER with instructions from me on how to handle the situation, what to ask staff, medical history, etc; and I signed on the computer and started working.

And I felt the clock ticking. It was going to be a full day of work, which would culminate in attending an event with my family, which I was also covering for a story later this week.

The ER had no available beds, so but they did move quickly with triage, labs, and medication to give him some relief. This last turned out to be a wonderful medication for him.

The girls kept me posted.

Eventually appendicitis was ruled out, but he was severely dehydrated. So IV fluids, instructions, one anti-nausea medication, and a few hours later, they brought him home, looking sick, but with having made of the decision to fly, with plenty of face masks and hand sanitizers because he is a very considerate person, too.

I'm really, really, really proud of him.

We set up another plan and answered all questions of "what if..." with plans in place before he left. He had a few more "what if" questions over the course of the evening, and we answered those, too.

Hopefully, he got some rest and is feeling better today, which I expect he is. Not great, I understand, or even good, but better. He may decided to pass on the professional development, and no one will fault him.

But I'm also very proud of Rebekah and Jasmine.

They handled things very well in the ER and pushed back when needed to get things moving. They came home and cleaned the entire house on very little sleep so I could work up until the last moment.

Around 3:30 p.m., we left with my in-laws for a wonderful evening, all on their treat. Beautiful people. We are blessed.

The obvious part of this "mom moment" is the caretaking part, which is true, I suppose. But follow this rabbit trail a moment.

As parents, our roles shift and change as our children grow. We don't (or at least we shouldn't) "parent" our 20 or 30 or 40-year-olds the way we parent younger children. But since we're always one step ahead of them, we can, when appropriate, equip them for the next step.

Rebekah and Jasmine know more about handing ER situations today than they did yesterday.

My oldest son Christopher, who has been fighting infections in his feet and will lost part of two toes on Wednesday, knows more about high blood pressure and diabetes today than he did even a few months ago.

Timothy learned some strategic planning while dealing with his own medical emergency and job obligations.

All of these simply took some thinking on my part and some conversations with them. They did all the rest, and they did it very well.

I am a huge believer in "not giving a child a fish" - unless, of course, someone is simply too down where the only option, indeed the compassionate option, is handing off a fish.

But how much more wonderful when parents can empower their children! The children in turn can empower THEIR children, etc. And one day, these same children may make power of attorney decisions for their parents using, hopefully, the guidance they received from the parents.

Oh, and look how beautiful the girls looked last night. One would think they'd had a spa day! <3 .="" p="">

I Now Have a Real Bed

So let me explain.

Back in 2007, my husband's sleep apnea and REM sleep behavior disorder was so bad, I began sleeping with a sleeping bag on the floor of my office attic. Rebekah had the bedroom next to it. That eventually led to us becoming bunk mates, which has persisted longer than we anticipated, but everyone is moving forward, so here we are.

Because of the way the roof sloped, a regular bed did not fit, just the box spring and mattress, and we were fine with it. But when we lost our house and could only afford one small storage unit for four people, we made careful decisions on what to take and what to discard. The box springs, being old, didn't make the cut. The mattresses, fairly new, did.

During the nine months we stayed at our mother's, Rebekah and I shared the guest bedroom. It had one bed. I insisted she take it. I slept on the floor. Eventually, we recovered financially enough for the four of us to move into a two-bedroom apartment. We emptied the storage until and brought the mattresses home.

We are now in a two-bedroom townhouse with the same mattresses, which are still in pretty good shape, and Rebekah and I still share a room, at least until the end of this year. Now this post isn't about "woe is us" because we ain't feeling any woe. We are gradually recovering financially; we just make careful financial choices.

No, this post is to brag a bit about my sons, of whom both work two jobs and pay for school.

A few weeks ago, Timothy noticed that the mattress on Daniel's futon was in pretty sad shape. He found a decent one on sale and surprised him with it. This past week, Daniel passed the blessing onto Rebekah and me.

He found two bed frames online ($55 each) that also serve as box springs and bought them. On Saturday, he assembled them and couldn't wait to ask the next morning how Rebekah and I slept.

Of course the response was, "Great!"

For me, the answer is less from the fact that I'm now off the ground (I mean, now I have to worry about falling out of bed, right), which isn't really a big deal to me, and more in the fact that my sons are fine young men.

Nothing makes a parent sleep easier at night than knowing she's sent some pretty good people out into the world.