Story Round-Up: Features in The Herald-News, April 2 to April 8

Good morning!

I have just twelve feature stories to share with you today and a few yet posted. So do check back on The Herald-News site: shawlocal.com/the-herald-news. Not only have I been sick this week 9not COVID), I'm also working on two big projects that are also taking up some time.

Here's what I wrote last week:

I can't recall the last time I welcomed Friday with such glee. I worked straight through last weekend and took Monday off because Sarah was in town for the weekend and leaving Monday afternoon. So I was thankful to spend some time with family.

And then midweek took a dive with a major family emergency. 

So I am especially happy to spend some extended period of time with the last two chapters of "Call of the Siren" and then tackle some of the more nuanced aspects of its editing (most of has gone through hard edits).

Well, by Friday afternoon, Rebekah and I realized we were both sick. And so we spent the weekend curled up with blankets and watching "Hill House" and "Bly Manor" - both of which Daniel had already watched and loved and really wanted us to find time to see. And so...

However, I finished the drafts and initial edits of the remaining chapters of Call of the Siren on Sunday. They need more because I wasn't at the top of my focus, but I have all of tomorrow with no interruptions to work on those - or, at least, that's the goal from this morning's point of view.

And then on Sunday, I will finish the first round of edits for a client.

Call of the Siren is the second book in the BryonySeries Limbo trilogy. I'm anticipating a late spring publication date, with gorgeous cover art by Nancy Calkins.

We plan to release Cornell Dyer and the Calcium Deficient Bones and Cornell Dyer and the "Mistical" Being very soon. Both Rebekah and our artist Sue Midlock have gone through health issues this past year, which has caused publication delays. But I'd rather have delays and healthy collaborators. Please send up good thoughts for them both.

Next up in the series: a Sherlock Holmes parody (the main character is Sherman Homes). Timothy is ready for a Cornell breakfast to share his ideas. He and I just need our time off schedules to sync. But that won't be this week as he is leaving this morning for a week-long business trip out of state. 

Jennifer Wainright (frontispiece artist for Lycanthropic Summer) has completed two portraits for  "Girls of the BryonySeries" series for tween girls and is currently working on a third. The portraits are beautiful and it shows that artist Jennifer Wainright can draw anything from werewolves to portraits! 

Rebekah Baran has completed cover art for two of "Girls of the BryonySeries" books. They are beautiful! One book in this series of eight books is completely written, a second is halfway written, and the rest are outlined. 

Now back to the twelve stories. Simply click on the link of the story that looks interesting to you. Happy scrolling!

But before the stories, I have a list of additional resources and information. Please check them out, too -

Finally, if you'd like to find more kindness in your life, consider this book.

And have a great Friday!

RECIPE OF THE WEEK

Sue's Diner is a fictional restaurant in the fictional Munsonville that only exists in the BryonySeries.

Each Sunday, we post a new recipe. The recipe is either featured in one of our cookbooks or will be featured in an upcoming cookbook.

Check out the recipe here.

WRITERS

If you're a writer anywhere in the world, you're welcome to join WriteOn Joliet's Facebook page. We're based in Joliet, Illinois, but we love to meet and interact with writers outside our area, too.

If you'd like to officially join WriteOn Joliet, we have two tiers of dues. We also have a marketing arm that's getting longer every year, well, except this year. Check us out at writeonjoliet.com.

I also suggest this book: Little Book of Revision: A Checklist for Fiction Writers. It's exactly as it says. Each page some with one suggestion for revision. The rest of the page is blank, so you can add your own notes. All proceeds benefit WriteOn Joliet.

If you need support in your writing, I highly recommend this Twitter group: #5amwritersclub. I  joined it last year. Writers support each other on Twitter and meet every three weeks at 5 a.m. (4 a.m. CST - needless to say, I am often late!) on Zoom.

If you need editing or help with self-publishing, check out dmbaranunland.com.

ARTISTS

If you need an artist for a project, I offer these recommendations.

NEWSLETTERS

Sign up for the Will County Go Guide and Sign up for the LocalLit Short Story and Book Review Newsletter at https://www.theherald-news.com/newsletter/

Sign up for The Munsonville Times by emailing us at bryonyseries@gmail.com. The newsletter still isn't official yet, so we don't have an actual link on the website - but we are working on it! 

SOCIAL MEDIA

Daily updates: I do post the briefs on Twitter during the week, so you're welcome to follow me at @Denise_Unland61.

BryonySeries stuff: I post curated content relating to the BryonySeries at @BryonySeries. And assorted related content at facebook.com/BryonySeries.

And of course, please follow the adventures of Bertrand the Mouse on Instagram at bertrand_bryonyseries.

BRYONYSERIES BOOKS

For books and more information about the series, visit bryonyseries.com.

BRYONYSERIES EVENTS

A full month of virtual events can be found at bryonyseries.com/calendar-of-events.

QUESTIONS

Email me at bryonyseries@gmail.com.

Thank you for reading The Herald-News. And for reading this blog. And if you've read (or plan to read) any of my books. Your support is greatly appreciated.

FEATURES

Silver Cross invites community to ‘celebrate new beginnings’ at its baby shower April 28: Proceeds will benefit its proposed neonatal intensive care unit 

Pets of the Week: April 4: Will County rescues have dogs and cats for adoption.

Joliet university offering summer program for students interested in teaching careers: High school students who have completed their sophomore year may apply.

Troy teacher receives marriage proposal while reading online to her students: Ryan’s students wondered when Ryan’s boyfriend would propose. They soon found out.

D-86 in Joliet announces its students of the month for March: Students at 13 buildings were recognized 

Providence Catholic H.S. to host Hall of Fame Dinner on Friday: The New Lenox high school will induct 8 honorees into its Green & White Hall of Fame 

Mystery Diner: East-side Knights serve up some of the best fish in Joliet: Don’t like fish? Then try one of the Knights’ chicken dinners 

Lockport gallery seeks entries for 2022 photography competition: Entries for Gallery Seven’s Open Lens XII due by April 30

CITGO donates $5,000 to Silver Cross Hospital’s new NICU: The New Lenox hospital plans to open the level 3 neonatal intensive care unit this spring 

5 Things to do in Will County: Easter egg hunts for kids and adults, STEM Fest 2022: Plus, enjoy a British romantic farce at Joliet West H.S. and comedy and Dave Landau and Peppa Pig Live! at the Rialto in Joliet

Bolingbrook principal named 2022 Illinois Middle School Principal of the Year: Keith Wood: ‘I consistently promote a culture of high expectations where students are expected to learn and grow’ 

Registration open for NAMI’s BeActive 5K and Yoga Cool-down event on June 11: Main focus is to raise awareness of the importance of mental health

Illustration by Matt Coundiff for "Visage"

Steward Setback Saturday: Ed Calkins on Pope Benedict's XVI's Resignation, Lent and Calkins Day, "Visage," and Revisiting the Marriage Proposal

I found this gem buried in my blog's archives.

Longtime readers: perhaps you recall it?

Shorttime readers: Enjoy!

 

Saturday, March 2, 2013

EdCalkins on Pope Benedict's XVI's Resignation, Lent and Calkins Day, "Visage," and Revisiting the Marriage Proposal

Dear Momi (Mistress of My Immortality):

Surely, you jest as to why I haven't been able to drop you a line. My internal investigation into the IVA's involvement with Pope Benedict’s resignation is quite difficult as you can imagine any internal investigation would be when you don't know who the members are.

 

As the only public member and spokesman, I can assure you that allegations of strong arming the Pope, intimidating him, or scribbling on him with colored markers, are being investigated. In case you haven't drawn any parallels into the Pope's resigning I should point out that Calkins Day fell on Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent for Catholics.

 

For members of faith, Lent is supposed to be a long period of fasting, somber refection, and self-denial, making it difficult for the joyful indulgence of Ireland’s most ruthless dictator, paper boy, and vampire extraorindaire. Of course this limitation only applies to Catholics; do you think there are any of those in Ireland?

 

I personally have argued against dispensation the way the Vatican treats St Paddy (who wants to piss off a saint), but I’m sure the Bishop of Rome was warned what might happen if Lent wasn't pushed back a month. (The season of Lent is determined by a lunar calendar, so the actual day moves; I think it’s the same in your Eastern Orthodox faith.)

 

Anyway, my reading of Visage has until now been delayed because I gave any too many copies, leaving me to share with my wife, granddaughter, and son. I've just started reading it... or will by the week’s end so NO SPOILERS, please.

 

Already my granddaughter, who was really too young to attempt the book—she’s nine-- is asking for her leprechaun and giggling. My wife groaned about newspapers and muttered that I'm going to need larger pants for my ego after this.

 

Once again, Momi, you must not feel guilty about turning down my proposal of marriage. The hurt inside will heal and make me a stronger, more ruthless vampire for the wear if it. I'll update you latter on the Pope thing.

Ruthlessly yours,

Ed Calkins,

Steward of Tara

Steward Setback Saturday: On Becoming an Ed Calkins Wife, Part 2

A post from 2012. If you find this amusing, read part one here.

BTW, I almost received one of the "famous" marriage proposals. I turned it down before Ed fully asked it.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

On Becoming an Ed Calkins Wife, Part 2

Waitresses are always welcome as wives of Ed Calkins, but they must actually wait on me! Also, one of my other wives has to be present. This is a new rule introduced by Debbie Blond (actual name Debbie Brown (remember her)) who objected to being bumped from wife number six back to wife seven without once meeting her competition. More on that later.

Understand that I quit writing marriage proposals on dollar bills years ago. I learned that it is impolite (and illegal) to deface currency. It’s also hard to read, "Will you marry me?" scrawled on a bill. Furthermore some women receive so many such messages that they get confused as to who it was that gave them the dollar bill. They tend to assume what they want to assume. (Why did you think Donald Trump has been married so many times?) Besides that, it’s tacky, making it seem like the bill is a bride for a “Yes.” But mostly it’s because I've simply run out of them.

This might surprise your readers considering I enjoy the financial compensation of a paperboy, but even an ocean can run out of water. (If I had a dollar for every girl I asked to marry before asking actually worked, maybe I'd still live in Tara this day (although the place needs rebuilding but you get the idea)).

By the time I met my first wife (the only one I actually sleep with (more on that)), I couldn't afford a dollar, so I bought her a vending machine cup of coffee (true story). But the buying of the coffee left me unable to afford a pencil to write “Will you marry me?” on it. I did ask her verbally, but you know how people forget things that aren't written down. (Hence route lists)

It cost me three years of awkward dating waiting for the answer to a question she'd forgotten. Finally, when I got the notion to bring the subject up again, she said "Marriage uh? Interesting... You have to prove your courage first. Ask my Daddy.”

To my surprise, her father was quite nice to me saying, "If you don't let the band play the chicken dance at the reception, you can marry my other two daughters as well.” With that promise sealed with a handshake, I thought my harem was finally on its way. The problem is; he never told his daughters about this arrangement. It’s been a tad awkward with wives two and three ever since.

I realize that this account of my first wife differs from the one in the book, but that shouldn't trouble your readers. A good myth should always have competing versions lest they both versions get lazy and stop embellishing.

BTW if anyone has a dollar bill from Ed Calkins with "Will you marry me?” written on it, and you wish to redeem it, consider yourself married. (Just let me know so I can update my spreadsheet.)

If instead you wish know the value of this testament to history, my appraisers advise me that you should spend the dollar. (I say, just give the dollar to a girlfriend less attractive than you. Thus, she will be more likely to say, “Yes.” That’s because I realized I'd never get as many wives as Ramsis III if I didn’t make proposals transferable.

Ruthlessly yours,

Ed Calkins, the Steward of Tara

Steward Setback Saturday: I Turned Down a Marriage Proposal. Now Comes the Fallout

Saturday, January 12, 2013

I Turned Down a Marriage Proposal. Now Comes the Fallout

Last month, during the Ed Calkins Book Signing Tour for Visage, Ed finally popped the question. It went something like this:

"Denise, would you....?"

"No."

Ed raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"I'll never be part of a harem," I explained, "not even a verbal harem."

Except for shaking his head in rueful regret at my supposed foolishness in turning down this most celebrated proposal of the millenium, I assumed Ed would have the grace and tact not to mention it again.

I was wrong.

This past week, I received the following admonishment from the Steward.


Dear MOMI (Mistress of My Immortality):


I am going through that seasonal change right now where I no longer think I'm Santa Claus and am trying to get in the swing of "ruthless dictator" before my trembling charges think I've gone soft.

I know things should be awkward between the two of us since you declined my proposal of marriage before I voiced it. The truth is, I'm so experienced in such matters that I have to remind myself that it should feel awkward, even though I don't feel so.

You, however, are likely not as experienced at shooting down the offer of marriage. I will admit that your character, Melissa, though younger than you, handled it better by changing the subject rather than refusing.

It's a good thing I didn't buy a ring.

I figured that you, by now, feel uneasy about your decision. Therefore, I have resolved to allow you to make it up to me with an unsolicited contribution to the IVA. You could donate five percent of all proceeds of the BryonySeries that exceed forty-six million dollars.

I will not embarrass you by refusing your offer (Remember how much you have already done for the IVA) or point out how such a money trail would disrupt our secrecy. No, I will do none of that. Like Melissa, I will simply change the subject.

What was I talking about?


Yours ruthlessly,

Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara

Steward Setback Saturday: Ed Calkins on Pope Benedict's XVI's Resignation, Lent and Calkins Day, "Visage," and Revisiting the Marriage Proposal

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Ed Calkins on Pope Benedict's XVI's Resignation, Lent and Calkins Day, "Visage," and Revisiting the Marriage Proposal

Dear Momi (Mistress of My Immortality):

 

Surely, you jest as to why I haven't been able to drop you a line. My internal investigation into the IVA's involvement with Pope Benedict’s resignation is quite difficult as you can imagine any internal investigation would be when you don't know who the members are.

As the only public member and spokesman, I can assure you that allegations of strong arming the Pope, intimidating him, or scribbling on him with colored markers, are being investigated. In case you haven't drawn any parallels into the Pope's resigning I should point out that Calkins Day fell on Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent for Catholics.

For members of faith, Lent is supposed to be a long period of fasting, somber refection, and self-denial, making it difficult for the joyful indulgence of Ireland’s most ruthless dictator, paper boy, and vampire extraorindaire. Of course this limitation only applies to Catholics; do you think there are any of those in Ireland?

I personally have argued against dispensation the way the Vatican treats St Paddy (who wants to piss off a saint), but I’m sure the Bishop of Rome was warned what might happen if Lent wasn't pushed back a month. (The season of Lent is determined by a lunar calendar, so the actual day moves; I think it’s the same in your Eastern Orthodox faith.)

Anyway, my reading of Visage has until now been delayed because I gave any too many copies, leaving me to share with my wife, granddaughter, and son. I've just started reading it... or will by the week’s end so NO SPOILERS, please.

Already my granddaughter, who was really too young to attempt the book—she’s nine-- is asking for her leprechaun and giggling. My wife groaned about newspapers and muttered that I'm going to need larger pants for my ego after this.

Once again, Momi, you must not feel guilty about turning down my proposal of marriage. The hurt inside will heal and make me a stronger, more ruthless vampire for the wear if it. I'll update you latter on the Pope thing.

 

Yours (not your husband, of course, but yours), truly,

Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara

An amazing marriage proposal for an amazing girl