Over My Head

I’m going out into the deep water where the fish are.

Last week, Fr. Joseph read the gospel about when Simon and his partners had fished all night and caught nothing. Jesus instructs them to cast their nets into the deep waters, and Simon, after a weak protest, complies. Of course, they caught so much fish their nets nearly broke.

Fr. Joseph said that we often try to do things our way with little or no results. However, the fish we really want to catch are out in the deep water, where it’s scary and bottomless. It’s a place we don’t usually choose to go.

For the umpteenth time in my life, I’m experiencing a complicated medical issue. The answer—again—is not a quick and easy one. The testing, diagnosis and ultimate management lies in waters I don’t want to tread. Yet, as the Ten Avenue North song Timothy keeps playing for me says, “This is where the healing begins.”

That sermon and song focuses my attention on the one who is calling me to the deep water. I close my eyes and take a shaky plunge, but I take it, confident that in that seeminly bottomless gulf of despair, I will find abundant healing.