Friday, August 16, 2013
"Please Confiscate the Vampire Skin" by Allie Rios and Story Round Up
Please Confiscate the Vampire Skin by Allie Rios
Please confiscate the vampire skin
That sparkles in the sun;
Give the predators evil powers
Like Bram Stoker would have done!
Slap on them some leather
and give them all a dark disguise;
Bring Blade with blackened sunglasses
To banish Edward’s unconvincing eyes.
Replace Bella with a woman
Who maintains a semblance of a clue;
Perhaps the angst-ridden Juliet
and Romeo’s fateful dagger would make do.
Release the shirtless werewolf
Whose abs would have more appeal
If his howling, sullen whininess
Could ever close the deal.
Please find me stronger villains
Than the Volturi seem to be;
Cruella De Ville’s available
And would tame those giant dogs for free.
Replace the clueless father
With one equally unaware;
Clark Griswold is a primo choice
For at least he combs his hair.
Once you’ve overcome the book
and brave the cinematic scene,
Remember as you publish your own
There’s writers worse than me!
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