Guest Post by Sir Frederick Chook: "Pride and Prisoner"

Pride & Prisoner by Sir Frederick Chook
Penned upon the 12th of April, 2007  
First appeared in FrillyShirt (www.frillyshirt.org

 

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters.

"Welcome, sir!” said she, as he steadied his horse at a clump of delicious hedge.

“Where am I?”

“This is our village, sir, and we’re very happy to have you as a guest here. You’ll find that Pritherfield is vacant if you’re looking for a house. Otherwise The Red Crab has very fine rooms, though of course I should not expect you to need to lodge at a public house, sir.”

“What do you want?”

“Well, sir, we were all so hoping you might attend our local dance to-morrow night. Sir Grilliam Blacknell hosts it and it is a very fine way to meet everybody, particularly handsome young ladies. You won’t find any handsomer than my daughters, though there will be a very many ladies interested in meeting a gentleman such as yourself, earning seven thousand a year.”

“I am not a number — I am a free man!”

“Oh, you are a funny sort, Mr Six! Do promise you’ll come to-morrow night, and bring your featureless spherical sister.”

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Sir Frederick Chook is a foppish, transcendentalistic historian who lives variously by his wits, hand to mouth, la vie bohème, and in Melbourne with his wife, Lady Tanah Merah.

When not reading Milton and eating Stilton, he writes, ponders, models, delves into dusty archives, and gads about town. He has dabbled in student radio and in national politics, and is presently studying the ways of the shirt-sleeved archivist. He is a longhair, aspiring to one day be a greybeard. He has, once or twice, been described as “as mad as a bicycle.”

FrillyShirt is a compilation of articles, essays, reviews, photographs, artworks, question-and-answers, promotions, travelogues, diatribes, spirit journeys, cartoons, ululations and celebrations by Sir Frederick, his friends and contributing readers. Irregularly regular features include Teacup in a Storm, an etiquette column, and How to be Lovely, advanced speculations on the aesthetics of the self.

Other topics that pop up include fun things in and around Melbourne, art, nature, history, politics and schnauzers. Sir Frederick’s favorite color is all of them. Enjoy his writing? Drop him a telegram at fredchook@frillyshirt.org.