Dear MOMI:
When the next book comes out, I'll load a cooler with ice cream, disposable bowls, and plastic spoons. We'll serve the free ice cream right where we're signing. I'll spring the cost of the ice cream.
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
O Steward:
Third book won't come out until late November. Sure you don't want to do it this summer?
Respectfully,
MOMI
Dear MOMI:
Do you think we can still sell the first two books at the DC? (Note: this is vampire code for "distribution center.") Is anyone there that reads still without a copy? I agree that summer would be better for ice cream. BTW, could you send me the Byrony links? I'm on a new computer.
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
O Steward:
Not sure who still wants any books, but an ice cream social is still a good promotion for Staked! which is coming out at the end of the year. That book has your biggest role. Besides, there's new people coming in the DC all the time.
Also, the official Visage, with the "official" art should be out in a couple of weeks. You'll receive a complimentary copy. FYI, Saturdays has the lowest carrier turnout. Any possible way you could get a sub and do a Sunday?
Respectfully, MOMI
Dear MOMI:
Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday are the only days I can't do it.
As far as getting a sub...if you mean submarine, that would be easier then finding someone to do my route. If you mean "submissive," you've read 50 Shades, and believe me, to all of them, doing a route is a "hard limit." If you mean submarine sandwich, I could, but it wouldn't help me take off a on Sunday.
Ice cream might draw a few carriers in early though if the word went out. In my own DC, which is not as personable as Joliet, it took two years to go from not finishing one bucket to finishing three (every one speaking only Spanish or Arabic assumed I was selling it).
O Steward:
Okay, then, pick a Saturday, and let's do it!
When the next book comes out, I'll load a cooler with ice cream, disposable bowls, and plastic spoons. We'll serve the free ice cream right where we're signing. I'll spring the cost of the ice cream.
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
O Steward:
Third book won't come out until late November. Sure you don't want to do it this summer?
Respectfully,
MOMI
Dear MOMI:
Do you think we can still sell the first two books at the DC? (Note: this is vampire code for "distribution center.") Is anyone there that reads still without a copy? I agree that summer would be better for ice cream. BTW, could you send me the Byrony links? I'm on a new computer.
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
O Steward:
Not sure who still wants any books, but an ice cream social is still a good promotion for Staked! which is coming out at the end of the year. That book has your biggest role. Besides, there's new people coming in the DC all the time.
Also, the official Visage, with the "official" art should be out in a couple of weeks. You'll receive a complimentary copy. FYI, Saturdays has the lowest carrier turnout. Any possible way you could get a sub and do a Sunday?
Respectfully, MOMI
Dear MOMI:
Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday are the only days I can't do it.
As far as getting a sub...if you mean submarine, that would be easier then finding someone to do my route. If you mean "submissive," you've read 50 Shades, and believe me, to all of them, doing a route is a "hard limit." If you mean submarine sandwich, I could, but it wouldn't help me take off a on Sunday.
Ice cream might draw a few carriers in early though if the word went out. In my own DC, which is not as personable as Joliet, it took two years to go from not finishing one bucket to finishing three (every one speaking only Spanish or Arabic assumed I was selling it).
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of TaraO Steward:
Okay, then, pick a Saturday, and let's do it!
Respectfully, MOMI
Dear MOMI:
Now wait a second. This might be a chance for you to flex
your newly found fame as an acclaimed novelist. Perhaps you can market the
John-John Peter experience. One of the most touching parts of Visage is the
connection of father and son on the "damn route." Maybe we can market
this. Bring your toddler and go out on a REAL Ed Calkins route! (Make sure that
toddler is barefoot).
BTW I laughed much longer then my wife at the throwing of
the shoe because I had a better picture. Did that every happen to you with one
of your little angels? Let's do the ice cream social on the Saturday near the
4th of July.
Also, can you give me Edgar or Frank's phone so I can ask
permission? My new phone never got my Joliet connections on speed dial.
Ruthlessly yours,
Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
Editor's note: I sent the steward the two agents' telephone
numbers, but I have received no further correspondence from the steward. I'm
assuming he's veyr busy conducting ruthless business. Further details on the
ice cream social--and if you've read Visage, you know how appropriate that
social is. If you haven't, come to the social, buy a copy personally
autographed by Ed Calkins, and find out--when and if they emerge.
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