The official blog of Denise M. Baran-Unland, author. Discover her books for all ages at bryonyseries.com.
Saturday, November 30, 2024
Friday, November 29, 2024
Story Round-Up: Features in The Herald-News, Nov. 23 to Nov. 29
Good morning!
Today we're hanging out at the North Pole Christmas Market from 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. at the Renaissance Center, 214 N. Ottawa St., Joliet. The Christmas Market is part of the Joliet City Center Partnership's "Light Up the Holidays Festival and Parade." And we are participating in THREE unique ways this year.
ONE AND TWO: I am reading two Christmas stories and raffling ten copies of "Bertrand the Christmas Surprise" books at 11 a.m. Details are here.
THREE: We are giving away twenty swag bags to the first twenty people at the BryonySeries booth. Each bag has a retails value of $30 to $35. No purchase is necessary. The swags bags are gifts.
But we do have crocheted mice for adoption and purple music roses are "thank yous" for select purchases. Those details are here.
I also have thirteen stories to share with you today at the bottom of this post with more stories going live over the weekend.
And I have five stories that were part of The Herald-News' second "Thank You, Veterans" edition.
So be sure to check back on The Herald-News site: shawlocal.com/the-herald-news.
But before the stories, I have a list of additional updates, resources, and information. Please check them out, too.
And if you'd like to find more kindness in your life, consider this book.
And have a great Friday!
Event Updates
The BryonySeries Christmas Display is now up at The Book Market in Crest Hill. Along with eleven curated BryonySeries books for you to browse and buy, the display features Ribbit-Ribbits from Cindy and free purple music roses with select purchases while supplies last.
WriteOn Joliet 8th Annual Anthology Release Party: 6 to 8 p.m. Dec. 5, Joliet Public Library, 3395 Black Road, Joliet. FREE chef-created heavy appetizers and desserts and FREE photos with Santa. Chance to meet WriteOn Joliet authors and browse many varieties of locally written genres. One-stop checkout.
Plus, the ByronySeries will appear at The Book Market in Crest Hill from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Dec. 17.
BryonySeries books-in-progress
House on Top of the Hill: Third book in the BryonySeries Limbo trilogy, and the book is now live on Amazon. Print copies should arrive on Sunday and be available for sale at WriteOn Joliet's anthology release party on Dec. 5.
The Adventures of Cornell Dyer: Timothy and Daniel are super busy with school on top of work (and plenty of work-related traveling). But Sue Midlock is already hard at work with the cover for the next book that involves a toymaker: "Cornell Dyer and the House of Horreur" (because the toymaker's last name is "Horreur."). Timothy and I have tentatively agreed to a "Cornell" breakfast when he's off school and work during the holidays. Here's hoping! (we are looooong over due).
I also outlined a "bonus" book that is intended for distribution at Bicentennial's "Ye Olde Mayfest" event in 2025. Here is a recap of the 2024 event.
Brainy Ann: The fifth book in The Girls of the BryonySeries is outlined and the first chapter is written, hurray! Jennifer Wainwright, who welcomed her first child into the world in April, is nearly done with the cover portrait. I let this book slide for other BryonySeries projects. But I'll return to this book in early 2025.
Jennifer designed the cover portraits for "Julie and the Too-Hard Homework," "Katie and the Big Fear," "Summer Sisters." and "Karla Joins In," as well as the frontispiece for "Lycanthropic Summer."
Rebekah is also slowly (very, very slowly) updating the BryonySeries YouTube and Pinterest accounts. And she' catching up with Kindles for some of the BryonySeries books. So do watch for those.
And finally...
I am working on the hard edits for Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara's third book in his Ruthless trilogy: "Recovering Ruthless."
Ed's first book is "Ruthless," his second is "The Fifth," and he is also the author of "Denise Unland's Irish Genealogy."
For books and more information about the series, visit bryonyseries.com.
RECIPE OF THE WEEK
Sue's Diner is a fictional restaurant in the fictional Munsonville that only exists in the BryonySeries.
Each Wednesday, we post a new recipe. The recipe is either featured in one of our cookbooks, will be featured in an upcoming cookbook, or is just an "extra" we want to share with you.
Check out the recipe here.
WRITERS
If you'd like to officially join WriteOn Joliet, we have two tiers of dues and two ways to attend meetings. We also have a marketing arm that's getting longer every year. Check us out at writeonjoliet.com.
Daily updates: I haven't posted anything on Twitter/X (except a daily Bible verse) since September I can no longer schedule posts in advance. I'm not sure yet how to manage the account without that option. But you're welcome to follow me at @Denise_Unland61.
BryonySeries stuff: I used to curated content relating to the BryonySeries on Twitter/X at @BryonySeries and still post assorted related content at facebook.com/BryonySeries, youtube.com/user/BryonySeries, and themes of each book in the BryonySeries at pinterest.com/bryonyseries.
Again, not sure yet about the direction of the BryonySeries Twitter/X account. Still mulling that over.
And of course, please follow the adventures of Bertrand the Mouse on Instagram at bertrand_bryonyseries.
QUESTIONS
Email me at bryonyseries@gmail.com.Thank you for reading The Herald-News. And for reading this blog. And if you've read (or plan to read) any of my books. Your support is greatly appreciated.
FEATURES
Be a Herald Angel: Help Will County United Way meet high community need
Sarah Oprzedek, United Way of Will County: ‘One hundred percent of those dollars go right back into the community’
Here’s how to shop local in Plainfield on Small Business
Saturday
Silver Cross Hospital names 2 new vice presidents
2 Bolingbrook men arrested in New Lenox on vehicle theft,
drug charges
Man in custody after barricading himself inside Plainfield
Township home
Plainfield Township man charged with battery after
barricading himself inside house
Joliet police ID alleged thief of reindeer decorations from
Slammers Stadium
The decorations are valued at $45,000
Joliet diocese tells visiting priest to leave church,
diocese; relic tour canceled
Downtown Plainfield gets Roman-style pizzeria
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/20/downtown-plainfield-gets-roman-style-pizzeria/
Lockport’s Nik & Ivy Brewing offers club memberships
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/19/lockport-brewery-founder-club-memberships-open/
Chicken-N-Spice in Shorewood now offers new menu item
Will County Pets of the Week: Nov. 25, 2024
Will County rescues have dogs and cats for adoption
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/25/will-county-pets-of-the-week-nov-25-2024/
5 Things to Do in Will County: Light Up The Holidays
Festival & Parade
By 5 Things to Do in Joliet and Will County
THANK YOU, VETERANS
Collins said he always tried to ‘make the right decisions’
Service is paramount to New Lenox physician and veteran
Dr. Joseph Hindo, Silver Cross: ‘Everyone should try to be of service to others.’
Joliet veteran ‘can’t do enough for veterans’
Dan Miller can’t imagine not serving in some way
Cancer leads Joliet Army veteran to service twice over
Skip Hoechbauer: ‘I love helping veterans and making them feel they’re not forgotten’
New Lenox veteran gives back through craftsmanship
Regina Lattuca, vice president of K9s for Veterans: ‘He really wants to help his fellow veterans.’
Illustration by Matt Coundiff for "Visage"
Thursday, November 28, 2024
Wednesday, November 27, 2024
Sue's Diner: Thanksgiving Salad Dressing
Each week for the last couple of weeks, I've featured one selected recipe from the Thanksgiving menu that's featured in the BryonySeries cookbook: Memories in the Kitchen: Bites and Nibbles from "Bryony," which is a permanent fundraiser for Big Brothers Big Sisters of Will and Grundy Counties.
For the Marchellis’ first Thanksgiving in Munsonville, Melissa’s little brother Brian shows off the depth of his newly acquired culinary skills, under the direction of his mentor, Steve Barnes, the village maintenance man.
This week, I'm featuring a really delicious salad dressing attributed to Steve in the novel and sumitted by Janet Cooney for the cookbook.
Now, you won't be able to receive a print copy before Thanksgiving (unless you live near me, and you arrange for pickup), but you can download a Kindle version now.
You can try also try the salad dressing recipe on the Sue's Diner page on the BryonySeries website. Proceeds from the Kindle version also benefit Big Brothers Big Sisters of Will and Grundy Counties.
But try the recipe this week. It will be gone some time next week. A new non-Thanksgiving recipe will take it's place.
For troubleshooting questions, email us at bryonyseries@gmail.com.
By the way, Sue's Diner is only real in the BryonySeries world. But didn't Timothy do a great job making the page look like a real menu at a vintage diner?
Here is the full diner page: bryonyseries.com/sue-s-diner. You can't really order, of course (wouldn't it be great if you could?).
For more BryonySeries recipes, check out our three cookbooks at our BryonySeries bryonyseries.com/general-store.
Tuesday, November 26, 2024
The FIT Foundation Donated 30 WriteOn Joliet Holiday Anthologies. Here's How You Can Get One
Angie is the founder of the FIT Foundation in Crest Hill, a meal prep company. And she approached me this summer, asking if I had any additional upcoming donation opportunities.
Well, it just so happens that WriteOn Joliet created its first holiday anthology this fall. So Angie offered to sponsor thirty copies, as a Christmas gift for the community.
The anthology has ninety-three pages of locally written poems, short stories, and essays that are perfect for the holiday season.
WriteOn Joliet Holiday Anthology Contributors: Denise M. Baran-Unland, Mauverneen Blevins, Ed Calkins, Pat Camalliere, Holly Coop, Steven James Cordin, Tom Hernandez, Cean Magosky, Sue Midlock, Colleen H. Robbins, Jennifer Russ, Stephen Saporta, and Duanne Walton.
Here are two ways you can get a free copy (while supplies last) of "Write Where We Are: Holiday Edition: Stories, poems, and essays for the holiday season."
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The swag bags will also contain one of more "mystery quotes," which are suitable for slipping into greeting cards, your purse or wallet, or any place someone might find a spark of imagination or inspiration.
But wait! That's not all!
The swag bags will also contain a "sweet treat" in BryonySeries colors, some special offers, and information about upcoming (and local) holiday events.
Now, depending on the book combinations, this BryonySeries swag bag (bag and contents) has a retail value of thirty to thirty-five dollars. And these are FREE to the first twenty-five North Pole Christmas Market attendees that stop at our table.
And don't forget, the BryonySeries table will also have FREE purple music roses with select book purchases, as well as crocheted mice for adoption with select book purchases, all while supplies last.
WriteOn Joliet will also have copies of both its holiday anthology and the 2024 edition of its "regular" anthology for sale at its 8th annual anthology release party on Dec. 5 at the Black Road branch of the Joliet Public Library.
Here are ten reasons why you should attend WriteOn Joliet's 8th Annual Anthology Release Party.
Does hearing the word FREE put you into the holiday spirit? It should - and not just because of "free."
"Free" is possible because of big-hearted people in the community who just want to be a blessing.
The anthologies are free because Angie Aegerter has (TWICE) donated copies for people's reading pleasure. Angie runs a small business, not a large corporation. And if you follow her business on Facebook, you will see the other ways she blesses the community all year round.
The "swag" is free because Jasmine made it herself and then gifted it to me.
The purple music roses are free (with select purchases) because Jan Stack, the youth services clerk at the Joliet Public Library, made them and gifted them to me.
The adoptable crocheted mice (with select purchases) are free because Cindy made the mice. An every one is hoping for loving home this holiday season.
The chef-created heavy appetizers at WriteOn Joliet's anthology release party are free because Timothy buys all the ingredients and makes all the food as his way of elevating the celebratory spirit as we connect local writers with local readers.
The photos with Santa at the release party are free because Santa is loving and giving.
And the rest if free because we at the BryonySeries want you to start the holiday season with a smile.
Many of us (including us) have struggled this past year (past few years for us) and might be coming in to the season feeling not quite so merry and bright.
And every now and again, it's nice to band together and bring a little of joy and generosity to our little portion of the world.
Happy Wednesday!
Editor's note: This post was updated to correct the amount of books going to each location.
Monday, November 25, 2024
Win a Bertrand The Mouse Christmas Book
Good morning!
I will be giving away TEN "Bertrand the Christmas Surprise" books on Friday in the North Pole Christmas Market at Joliet's annual "Light Up the Holidays" event, which is held every year in several downtown locations the day after Thanksgiving.
For the first time, the North Pole Christmas Market will feature a story time event, and I was asked to select and read the Christmas stories.
I chose two, which I will read at 11 a.m., before the drawing.
Both books are beloved Christmas books from my childhood.
And both books reference mice, so Bertrand (of course) is thrilled.
Yes, Bertrand will join me for story time since he exists in order to bring the joys of reading to children.
The books are softcover and will easily slide into a standard Christmas stocking, if you can hold off reading them for that long.
So I'm thankful for the opportunity to be a positive part of a holiday kickoff event.
What fills you with thankfulness today?
Sunday, November 24, 2024
Saturday, November 23, 2024
Friday, November 22, 2024
Story Round-Up: Features in The Herald-News, Nov. 16 to Nov. 22
Good morning!
I have thirteen stories to share with you today at the bottom of this post with more stories going live over the weekend, especially since I'm working this weekend.
And I have five stories that were part of The Herald-News' second "Thank You, Veterans" edition.
So be sure to check back on The Herald-News site: shawlocal.com/the-herald-news.
But before the stories, I have a list of additional updates, resources, and information. Please check them out, too.
And if you'd like to find more kindness in your life, consider this book.
And have a great Friday!
Event Updates
The BryonySeries Christmas Display is now up at The Book Market in Crest Hill. Along with eleven curated BryonySeries books for you to browse and buy, the display features Ribbit-Ribbits from Cindy and free purple music roses with select purchases while supplies last.
We are also participating in three more events (so far) in November and December.
North Pole Christmas Market: 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Renaissance Center, 214 N. Ottawa St., Joliet. The Christmas Market is part of the Joliet City Center Partnership's "Light Up the Holidays Festival and Parade." And we are participating in THREE unique ways this year. More details to come later.
WriteOn Joliet 8th Annual Anthology Release Party: 6 to 8 p.m. Dec. 5, Joliet Public Library, 3395 Black Road, Joliet. FREE chef-created heavy appetizers and desserts and FREE photos with Santa. Chance to meet WriteOn Joliet authors and browse many varieties of locally written genres. One-stop checkout.
Plus, the ByronySeries will appear at The Book Market in Crest Hill from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Dec. 17.
BryonySeries books-in-progress
House on Top of the Hill: Third book in the BryonySeries Limbo trilogy, and the book is now live on Amazon. Print copies should arrive on Sunday and be available for sale at WriteOn Joliet's anthology release party on Dec. 5.
The Adventures of Cornell Dyer: Timothy and Daniel are super busy with school on top of work (and plenty of work-related traveling). But Sue Midlock is already hard at work with the cover for the next book that involves a toymaker: "Cornell Dyer and the House of Horreur" (because the toymaker's last name is "Horreur."). Timothy and I have tentatively agreed to a "Cornell" breakfast when he's off school and work during the holidays. Here's hoping! (we are looooong over due).
I also outlined a "bonus" book that is intended for distribution at Bicentennial's "Ye Olde Mayfest" event in 2025. Here is a recap of the 2024 event.
Brainy Ann: The fifth book in The Girls of the BryonySeries is outlined and the first chapter is written, hurray! Jennifer Wainwright, who welcomed her first child into the world in April, is nearly done with the cover portrait. I let this book slide for other BryonySeries projects. But I'll return to it in early 2025.
Jennifer designed the cover portraits for "Julie and the Too-Hard Homework," "Katie and the Big Fear," "Summer Sisters." and "Karla Joins In," as well as the frontispiece for "Lycanthropic Summer."
Rebekah is also slowly (very, very slowly) updating the BryonySeries YouTube and Pinterest accounts. And she' catching up with Kindles for some of the BryonySeries books. So do watch for those.
And finally...
I am working on the hard edits for Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara's third book in his Ruthless trilogy: "Recovering Ruthless."
Ed's first book is "Ruthless," his second is "The Fifth," and he is also the author of "Denise Unland's Irish Genealogy."
For books and more information about the series, visit bryonyseries.com.
RECIPE OF THE WEEK
Sue's Diner is a fictional restaurant in the fictional Munsonville that only exists in the BryonySeries.
Each Wednesday, we post a new recipe. The recipe is either featured in one of our cookbooks, will be featured in an upcoming cookbook, or is just an "extra" we want to share with you.
Check out the recipe here.
WRITERS
If you'd like to officially join WriteOn Joliet, we have two tiers of dues and two ways to attend meetings. We also have a marketing arm that's getting longer every year. Check us out at writeonjoliet.com.
Daily updates: I haven't posted anything on Twitter/X (except a daily Bible verse) since September I can no longer schedule posts in advance. I'm not sure yet how to manage the account without that option. But you're welcome to follow me at @Denise_Unland61.
BryonySeries stuff: I used to curated content relating to the BryonySeries on Twitter/X at @BryonySeries and still post assorted related content at facebook.com/BryonySeries, youtube.com/user/BryonySeries, and themes of each book in the BryonySeries at pinterest.com/bryonyseries.
Again, not sure yet about the direction of the BryonySeries Twitter/X account. Still mulling that over.
And of course, please follow the adventures of Bertrand the Mouse on Instagram at bertrand_bryonyseries.
QUESTIONS
Email me at bryonyseries@gmail.com.Thank you for reading The Herald-News. And for reading this blog. And if you've read (or plan to read) any of my books. Your support is greatly appreciated.
FEATURES
Be a Herald Angel: Help Will County United Way meet high
community need
Sarah Oprzedek, United Way of Will County: ‘One hundred
percent of those dollars go right back into the community’
Joliet Area YMCA breaks ground on Shorewood facility
New center envisioned as serving residents from all over
region
Joliet Rotary hosting ‘Merry Merry Margarita’ fundraiser
Ticket deadline is Dec. 1.
Joliet food bank donates meat waste to Lockport wildlife
ranch
The Northern Illinois Food Bank tries to make sure ‘nothing
goes to waste’
Silver Cross New Lenox earns 20th ‘A’ for patient safety
Silver Cross was recognized for ‘tireless efforts to put
patients first’
Crest Hill meal prep company looking for donations for first
responders Thanksgiving meals
Downtown Plainfield gets Roman-style pizzeria
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/20/downtown-plainfield-gets-roman-style-pizzeria/
Lockport’s Nik & Ivy Brewing offers club memberships
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/19/lockport-brewery-founder-club-memberships-open/
Chicken-N-Spice in Shorewood now offers new menu item
Register now for Breakfast with Santa at Joliet’s University
of St. Francis
Registration deadline is Nov. 25
Will County waives pet adoption fees for veterans and active
service members in November
Appointments must be made in advance to meet adoptable pets
Will County Pets of the Week: Nov. 18, 2024
Will County rescues have dogs and cats for adoption
https://www.shawlocal.com/the-herald-news/2024/11/18/will-county-pets-of-the-week-nov-18-2024/
https://www.shawlocal.com/thescene/2024/11/21/5-things-to-do-in-will-county/
THANK YOU, VETERANS
Collins said he always tried to ‘make the right decisions’
Service is paramount to New Lenox physician and veteran
Dr. Joseph Hindo, Silver Cross: ‘Everyone should try to be of service to others.’
Joliet veteran ‘can’t do enough for veterans’
Dan Miller can’t imagine not serving in some way
Cancer leads Joliet Army veteran to service twice over
Skip Hoechbauer: ‘I love helping veterans and making them feel they’re not forgotten’
New Lenox veteran gives back through craftsmanship
Regina Lattuca, vice president of K9s for Veterans: ‘He really wants to help his fellow veterans.’
Illustration by Matt Coundiff for "Visage"
Thursday, November 21, 2024
BryonySeries at the North Pole Christmas Market
So my "wish list" event for many years was participating in the North Pole Christmas Market at Joliet's annual "Light Up the Holidays" event, which is held every year in several downtown locations the day after Thanksgiving.
The Joliet City Center Partnership hosts a wonderful event with live entertainment, ice skating, horse-drawn carriages, visits with Santa, ice sculpture demos, children's Ferris wheel, slide, tree lighting (canceled this year due to construction downtown), and a large parade towards evening.
Usually by the time I had my family holiday schedule (who was doing what, when, and where), I'd run out of time to apply.
This year I was smart (it happens sometimes), and I applied early. And I was accepted!
So needless to say...
And we also have crocheted mice for adoption for adoption for those who purchase three Bertrand books for $15, which is discounted from $7 for each book, one mouse per three books (while mice are available).
Bertrand knows each and every one of them, and he can assure you they will make lovely companions, all of which will be very thankful to have a new home for the holidays.
Happy Thursday!
Wednesday, November 20, 2024
Sue's Diner: Easy Berry Trifle
My mother, Virginia Schonbachler, contributed this recipe to the BryonySeries cookbook Memories in the Kitchen: Bites and Nibbles from "Bryony."
She often made it for holiday gatherings when my children were growing up because the kids liked it so much. It is easy-to-prepare and a good "extra" dessert to serve at Thanksgiving for people who don't like pumpkin pie.
We renamed it Darlene's Trifle for the cookbook because in Bryony, the protagonist's mother also made this recipe for Thanksgiving dinner.
Try this recipe on the Sue's Diner page on the BryonySeries website.
But try the recipe this week. It will be gone some time next week. A new recipe will take it's place.
All proceeds from Memories in the Kitchen: Bites and Nibbles from "Bryony." benefit Big Brothers Big Sisters of Will and Grundy Counties.
Order the cookbook from the BryonySeries store or from Amazon.
If you have any troubleshooting questions or comments, email us at bryonyseries@gmail.com.
Here is the full diner page: bryonyseries.com/sue-s-diner. You can't really order, of course (wouldn't it be great if you could?).
For more BryonySeries recipes, check out our three cookbooks at our BryonySeries bryonyseries.com/general-store.
Tuesday, November 19, 2024
Two Boys and a Sign
To paraphrase a popular saying, with great opportunity comes great responsibility.
Meaning, Jan Staley, owner of The Book Market in Crest Hill, has been wonderfully generous in giving BryonySeries a display space inside her store.
And the collaboration has been wonderful, including ways to draw people's attention top the display and giving them basic information about special offers, gifts, etc.
So that has led to an ever-changing array of homemade signs.
You should know I'm completely useless in that regard.
Daniel, however, is amazing. And for every display except one, he's made the signs, often collaborating with Rebekah.
For 2025, we're seeking ways to make signage easier, such as a felt board or magnetic board. This will save us sign time, for time is an especially precious resource in our family.
So naturally the final sign of 2024 gave us trouble, so much so that the BryonySeries Christmas display went up last week without the sign.
The fault lay within the paper. The letters simply wouldn't stick to it, even after throwing our best solutions at it.
So Daniel began anew last night. And Timothy joined him.
The project took several hours, which is a wealth of time when these young men working very full-time jobs and are taking master level classes.
Now anyone who walks into The Book Market for the rest of the year, they will see a festive sign and the information.
But the subtext of that sign shows a few other things, too: a commitment to help out with a task I can't properly executive, the willingness to give up their time and give of themselves for a project that doesn't directly benefit them, and the ability to collaborate to get the job done.
And today, I'll be sitting across that sign from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. with full knowledge that the sign is more than paper, stickers, and bows.
The sign represents the characters of two fine young men,
Happy Tuesday!
Monday, November 18, 2024
Back to The Book Market on Tuesday
If you're out and about the Crest Hill area tomorrow (Nov. 9), be sure to pop into The Book Market between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m.
You can check out our BryonySeries Christmas display of eleven curated BryonySeries books, Cindy's backpack bear Ribbit-Ribbits, and free purple music roses with select purchases (all while supplies last).
Rebekah and I will be hanging out with the rest of the books in the series, too. We'll be able to answer your questions about the series and maybe read an excerpt (or two) of your choice.
The Book Market owner Janet Staley is super-friendly, too, and always ready and willing to help you find the perfect book in this family-owned bookstore of new, used, and rare books.
We'll also have information about upcoming events, such as WriteOn Joliet's anthology release party on Dec. 5, where you can pick up a wide variety of locally written books in a wide variety of genres for all the bookworms on your holiday list.
Hope to see you there!
Sunday, November 17, 2024
Saturday, November 16, 2024
Excerpt from "Recovering Ruthless" by Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara
Now that "House on Top of the Hill" (the third book in the BryonySeries Limbo trilogy) is published, I'm working on the hard edits on "Recovering Ruthless," the third book in the BryonySeries Ruthless series by Ed Calkins, Steward of Tara.
The goal, of course, is publication before Calkins Day 2025, so with the holidays and all, I will definitely be busy.
Here is part of the third chapter, which references familiar characters (for the one or two out there who's read my books).
Just keep in mind that Ed - as a character and an author - is unreliable and lives completely in his imagination.
Or as Ed said in "Staked!": "I, like all creators of mythology, can’t stress out over what actually happened when I can control what I imagined happened.”
Enjoy!
CHAPTER 3:
FRAUDULENT
It was/is/will be on the last day of Tara, the worst Christmas in Beulah County, or page 439 in the BryonySeries novel “Staked!”
But all of that was subject to perception.
Fists pummeled his brain.
“John-Peter! You promised! Where are you? Come back! Come back! Come
back!"
He wrapped his fingers around the
locket chain and mustered up the hardest words he ever had to say. “I’m not
coming back, Karla!”
For the last time, John-Peter
reached up to slam a door, but his waist snapped in two. Pain faded. Karla’s
lips met his. His stepfather, Kellen Wechsler, smiled as John Peter sold
another burial plot. Karla and he broke into the basement of Eircheard’s pawn
shop. “You’re not human,” Dr. Rothgard told him, and John-Peter held a knife at
his neck. A newspaper flew out the van window while Uncle Ed’s undead life kept
growing dim. Imaged Tara faded into a growing black hole. Soda bread. Dying.
Mother.
“I’m here, John Peter,” his mother answered sobbing.
Her touch felt warm. Banshee wailed as nothingness comforted her hands on his
cheeks.
John Simons is not your father. Grinning leprechauns.
Piano music. Faries and enchanted mirrors.
Peace.
“Mrs. Wechsler, the chaplain wants a word with you.”
“Did he hear me before he died?”
“Yes, I’m sure he did.”
Blackness. Final peace.
It didn’t last long.
Bright lights were too intense to see anything, but he
could hear.
“Error, error,” a mechanical soothing voice informed
him. “Please remain calm. System aborting. Linkage lost with interface.
Distress call initiated. Would you like to see our special deals while you're
waiting? Unable to connect with internet. Ejecting. Please seek immediate
psychiatric care. Thank you for using ‘We-Live-Yellow Electronic Womb. Merry
Christmas and have a happy eighteenth birthday.”
John Peter felt himself flung into the air, past the
tree line into the clouds. Open air felt deliciously cool on his skin. The
thing is…he never landed.
All at once, he was in a large comfortable bedroom,
sitting at a small wooden desk. A mirror hung on the wall he was facing, but
the image in it wasn’t anyone he knew. A polite knock on the door didn’t give
him a chance to take it all in. It opened before he answered.
The attractive blond girl was carrying a musket.
“Judge Arkins will not be seeing you today as he is
busy with other cases,” she informed him in a neutral voice. “His Ruthlessness
will see you now and decide what actions to take concerning your case. Follow
me.”
Something was different about her. She wasn’t from
modern times, but he couldn’t place who or what…
“Are you quite done gawking? Move. Now.”
Her musket had a bayonet. On the march down a long
hallway, he realized that the girl’s shoes feet were wider and flatter than
they should be. She was Ireland’s interpretation of a mermaid called a merrow.
He must still be in Uncle Ed’s imagination somehow. Didn’t he already kill him?
The merrow made the greeting an announcement before
opening the large double doors.
“Steward, the prisoner awaits your mercy.”
Uncle Ed Calkins, also known as the Steward of Tara,
sat on the far end of a long, narrow, empty dining table with only two chairs, including
the one he was sitting in. He seemed as confused as John-Peter. The guard left
in a rush, as if she feared what was about to happen.
Ed squinted despite his glasses.
“Henry?”
“John Peter,” John-Peter corrected. His own voice
seemed as strange to him as it was unsure.
“Come. Sit close to me so I can see you better.”
The Steward made it seem like he had a choice. “If I
didn’t have you to deny it, I’d swear you were Henry Matthews, but you say
you’re John Peter. How? Oh, I remember now. Why are you here? Shouldn’t you be
selling burial plots or throwing papers with me if you’re not at home or in
school?”
John Peter answered with a frustrated wave of his
hand. The motion felt unfamiliar. “Apparently, I’m a prisoner awaiting your
mercy.”
“Why? What did you do?” The
Steward studied the incredulous look on John-Peter’s face. “Look, if you think
I should know this or you’ve told me before, you were probably telling a later
version of me. It seems I will become more incompetent as I become more
experienced. I was called by what will be me to solve what will be a problem
and you are just an interruption. So tell me again, what did you do?”
“I thought I killed you.
“Ah that. Page 434. I’m pretty sure you think you
conspired with some of my slave poets to shoot an arrow through my back during
a limerick competition. Is that what will happen?”
“Please tell me this isn’t my afterlife.”
“It’s not. You’re not done with
your first. And sorry, but ‘I thought I killed you’ isn’t going to cut it with
the judge here. If you’re going to go with that, you need to sound a lot more
definite. I know Judge Arkins, and he’s a stickler for positive proof. He’ll
dismiss your case before you have a chance to claim that you had a hand in it.”
John Petter shook his head. “Why
would I prove that I did kill you? Wouldn’t I try to prove that I didn’t?”
“You didn’t. That’s the problem.”
“Then, I’m free to go and we can
end this pointless discussion?”
Ed Calkins sighed heavily,
“Let’s not do this on an empty
stomach,” he told the young man and then called out. “Good merrow, we are ready
to order.
A different merrow rushed forward.
She was as beautiful as the first but dressed in a Sue’s Diner uniform. She had
no musket but held a pad and quill pen.
“Goblet of blood for you, Your
Ruthlessness?” the merrow asked, quill pen poised over the pad, ready to jot
the order.
“Thanks, Wendy. That will do.”
“And you, sir, what will…hey! My
eyes are up here, sir!”
The Steward broke in
diplomatically. “Never mind him, Wendy. Just bring him prime rib and lobster.
Cook the prime rib medium rare and bring plenty of butter for the lobster.”
“As you say, Your Ruthlessness.”
She bowed to the Steward of Tara but gave John Peter a hostile glare before
returning to the kitchen.
When she was gone, Ed Calkins leaned
forward and studied John-Peter, who now looked highly annoyed. “I can see that
you’re upset. You’ll have to forgive the merrows. They are in a sexual
harassment suit with the leprechauns right now. Perhaps they're hypervigilant
about any unwanted attention, even if the attention isn't really that unwanted.
You know how crude leprechauns can be.”
“And you know I don't eat meat,”
John Peter retorted. “Even a prisoner has the right to edible food. I can't eat
anything from an animal. I'm a vegan. You know this.”
But Ed had already launched into
a monologue about something or another.
“…and so your father, John Simons
who wasn’t really your father, but everyone back then knew him as John Simotes,
told me that I had died and come back as a vampire. Well, I didn’t believe him
until he placed a slab of uncooked corn beef in front of me, completely raw,
mind you. I scuffed the whole thing down like it was my last meal, but what
really shocked me was the way I wanted more…the bloodier the better. I could
have...”
John Peter’s eyes found another
mirror that should have captured the reflection of the diners. Instead, it
showed a single person: the young man with dark, neatly combed, shortish hair
that he had seen in the bedroom.
“…don’t you see? That was the
brilliance to my plan. John Simons couldn’t believe me when I told him that
artificial intelligence was beyond my ability as a programmer. I couldn’t argue
with him successfully because you were already here. So, cleverly convincing
him that he was right, I... ah, the food is here.”
The food was carefully matched to
the proper diners. John Peter frowned at his plate. Uncle Ed sipped his blood
goblet expectingly. Something was wrong. The sight of dead fish and animals
should have turned his stomach. Instead, the smell seemed inviting. There
wasn't a single plant-based item on his plate.
“Go ahead,” Ed urged.
“I can’t eat this. You programed
me to shudder at dead flesh.”
“I did promise to do that. I’m a
fraud, I’m afraid. Take a bite.”
John Peter did as he was told.
Cutting a piece of the prime rib and putting it to his lips made his mouth
water. The deliciousness of the mouthful was undeniable. “Are you sure this is
meat?”
Uncle Ed nodded. “This is your
Pinocchio moment. It seems like you're not changeling anymore. You're a real
boy now.”
“Dr. Rothgard lied to me.”
“No, young man. I lied to Dr.
Rothgard. He told you that I made you because that's what I told him. The truth
is I didn't make you as much as I recruited you. You were a deal I made with
three others. John Simons wanted a son and gave his blood and a leg from his
prized piano to the construction. Eircheard was to build a stock changeling of
the finest quality from those two materials, and I was to write software to
make that changeling something special. Knowing that was beyond me, I instead gave
Eircheard a creature to put inside that Oakwood 360 changeling. I mistakenly
thought it was a wood sprite named Glorna. His name might have been Glorna, but
he was no wood sprite. He was an imp hypnotized into believing he was a wood
sprite. Eircheard knew about that. What no one knew was the additional step I
took because I had an infant that Glorna brought me, and he wasn’t going
anywhere unless I made sure that infant had a childhood. That baby is the young
man you see in the mirror.”
“But I was slightly green…with
red hair!”
“No. You were inside an
electrical device from the distant future. It cost me two trips to the end of
time and back to get the thing. From that ‘electronic womb,’ you and Glorna
acted together to make John-Peter Simotes. It was the Oakwood 360 unit that was
green. It was Glorna that couldn’t eat meat the same way an alcoholic can't
drink the smallest bit of alcohol lest he go back to what he was. Before he was
part of John-Peter, he ate a woodsman. Once an imp tastes blood…well imagine
John-Peter’s childhood as a cannibal.”
“And now?” John-Peter stuffed
another bite of prime rib into his mouth.
“Now? You’re grounded, of course.
Your mother died giving birth to you. Your father died in a murder/suicide. He
became a vampire and his victim, also a vampire, became your stepfather. Both
vampires have been staked, so all you have for a guardian is me. Sorry about
that, but your grounded for the next eight years. It won’t be so bad. I sent
you to the future of this Tara, which is still in the ancient past, but all
portals that lead to Munsonville do so in the year 2019. That’s how I know you
won’t escape. That’s where we are right now, so most of your grounding is
already served.”
“But you’re grounding me for a
crime you claim I didn’t commit.”
“Indeed. You’re welcome. You have
to prove to Judge Arkins that you would have been brave enough to kill your
uncle to save the imprisoned young women. My punishing you for it might help
your case. I know you think you did. You remember doing it, but that was Glorna
who did the deed, not you. You never went through the enchanted mirror. You
remember what happened only because of the telepathic link that Glorna had with
you. Try and understand. Most vampires just crawl into their coffins when it's
time to sleep. Some have to reenact their murder or suicide every day just
before sunrise. I only reanimate once a year, but somebody has to kill me.
Sometime in my future, Glorna will. But I believe that you would do the same.
The two of you are like twins. You had the same parents and shared the same
thoughts for the last eighteen years. The only difference is you're different
creatures and only you have parents. That was another fraud. Your mother,
Bryony, was the first love and wife of John Simons, but John was not the
father. Care to guess who your father was?”
“Henry Mathews?”
“Indeed. Can you imagine what he
would have done to you if he’d found out that you were the love child of that
illicit pair? That's why I kept you living your life remotely in that
electronic womb. Now you have to prove to a judge that you would have murdered
Ed Calkins and traded yourself for the girl you call Angela – even though her
name is 42 – just as Glorna did. If you can prove that, your sentence would be
a four-year, full ride to Jenson college.”
It was all too much for the
eighteen-year-old. “So I’m not a changeling anymore?”
“You never were.” Ed took another
sip. “And if you continue to call yourself John-Peter Simotes, people that knew
him will not be amused. John-Peter Simotes is dead now, and the pieces that
made him are ready to live their own lives. For Glorna, that’s going to be far
more difficult. He’s been three different creatures. I think you should take
your father’s name. Matthews. Jean-Pierre Matthews.
“Jean-Pierre is just John-Peter
in French,” the boy informed the vampire dryly. “And I must be sick, or the
food is enchanted. I can’t eat another bite.”
“No matter,” the Steward replied.
Then he shouted at the door. “Wendy, would you come here for a moment? I have a
candidate for the Red Branch that I’d like you to consider.”
The youth was shocked. “You don’t
mean the Knights of the Red Branch, do you Uncle Ed? You’ve been filling me
with those legends for years.”
The annoyed merrow rushed forward
immediately, but upon noticing that no others had entered the room, she began
clearing plates and paid no notice to Jean-Pierre. When the Steward called her
out, the merrow frowned but politely set the silverware she was carrying on the
table.
“With all due respect, Your
Ruthlessness, I cannot be compelled to accept any lad just because you desire
it.”
“Noted, Wendy. I only ask that
you consider him.”
“Didn’t you say he’s eighteen? He’s
too old. We don’t accept married men and if he’s been unable to find a wife by
that age…well.”
“Boys don’t marry so early where
he’s from.”
The merrow sighed and looked Jean-Pierre
over in a way that made the lad blush.
“Stand up,” she directed with her
hand as much as her mouth.
Reluctantly,
he complied.
“Turn around.”
Her boldness made her pause, but –
again – Jean-Pierre did as he was told.
“See how you like it,” she hissed
but then addressed the Steward. “He’s attractive enough, but in what way is he
elite? Has he known battle? Because for the looks of him, he’s hardly been
outdoors.”
“He killed a vampire once,” the
Steward hedged. “But that was an accident and only half of him participated…the
half he was not, I’m guessing.”
“Kellen Wechsler?” the still
standing lad turned to ask.
The vampire nodded his head, but the merrow was
clearly not impressed. She stared him down with one more question.
“Life for a Red Branch Knight is
hard,” the merrow said, almost defiantly. “Why do you wish to be in their
number?”
“I really don’t.” Jean-Pierre answered
honestly. “It’s my uncle’s idea.”
