We're Not Meant to Hide Under the Bed

My post for Feb. 16, "My Cat is a Phoenix," summarized yet another story of my calico Faith's triumph of her small cell lymphoma that should have claimed her life in 2022.

However, on February 20, I reached out to Dr. Beechler, who had provided end-of-life care and euthanasia to Frances and Midnight, to assess Faith. 

Dr. Beechler offered to come out the following morning, which she did.

You see, Faith was back to doing Faith things: eating, drinking, cuddling, sitting in my chair, looking out the window - except she was also spending more and more time hiding under my bed.

That behavior began around the holidays, when Faith started what I termed "sundowning" - retreating beneath my bed for a few hours starting around twilight.

But during her past week of life, she spent all of her time under the bed, except when performing the above-mentioned activities.

I was 50/50 on what to do.

And so was Dr. Beechler when she arrived that Saturday morning and assessed her. Faith was overall doing well, except she had now developed a heart murmur she didn't have the previous week.

So technically, Faith hit all the "quality of life" markers for a cat - except for hiding under the bed.

She was living life, but not living life, if that makes sense.

When I woke up that Saturday morning, even before I opened my eyes, I gave Faith a test she didn't know I'd given her.

As was her habit, Faith started off the night sleeping on her blanket on my bed.

By morning, she'd be sitting on top of my little cabinet near the bed, looking out the window, also her habit.

So that morning, I opened my eyes and looked at the cabinet. No Faith.

You guessed it. Faith was already hiding under the bed.

While people and animals need to slip into their comfort ones from time to time, we all know that true growth and the meaning of life is not found by hiding under the bed.

That repeated, persistent act from Faith told me her quality of life had lost that indefinable quality that made life quality for Faith, enough that she tried to find solace in retreat.

As we navigate through life, sometimes we need to find solace in retreat. But I believe we instinctively know that true life happens beyond our comfort zones. 

As uncomfortable life is beyond those comfort zones, life's elusive magic is really found there.

And as we and our loved ones journey through life, we, too, will need to discern when to fight, when to step back, when to stive for a cure, for palliative care, for hospice, for the afterlife.

None of these discernments come with easily defined markers and boxes to check.

Not for us. And apparently not for our pets either.

But on February 21, when I opened my eyes to Faith's empty spot at the window, I knew one thing for certain.

We didn't bring Faith back from the brink of death to hide under the bed.

And so, a few hours later, we let her go.

A Gift of Poppyseed

I have a longstanding love for poppyseed that extends deeply back into my youngest years.

Last week, someone gifted me with this poppyseed roll during Faith's last week.

Rebekah and I had bought a variety of tempting foods for Faith, and her interest in them increased as the week progressed.

Her favorite was a soup with minced chicken pieces. By Saturday morning, Faith only had one soup left. I save it, just in case she stayed with it and needed it later in the day.

Unfortunately, "staying" was not in Faith's best interests. Dr. Beechler came with tuna and chicken sticks and asked which Faith might prefer.

Faith, of course, preferred the soup. 

Fortunately, a bit of this roll still also remained on Saturday.

After Dr. Beechler left I had a slice of poppyseed roll in Faith's honor, completely a comforting culinary circle of life.

My Cat is a Phoenix

Anyone who's followed by Faith's nearly four-year cancer journey, knows this little kitty has defied the odds (and her eventual fate) more than nine lives should allow - including one dramatic turn for the better one hour before her euthansia more than two years ago.

Well, she's beat them again, at least for this moment.

Because of her longterm steriod use (anticipated to be a couple of months, not years), Faith drinks a lot but can't keep up with the fluid loss. So she was recently prescribed subcutaneous fluids twice a week at home.

Before Faith received Fluid Treatment No. 1, we had the carpet stretchers at opur house. My room and the hall had rather suddenly developed a large, long trail of  a hump that urgently needed repair due to its size, location, and hazard (large enough we kept tripping over it).

That means completely emptying my room, a many-hour task on Calkins Day, for which I took the day off work.

Well, the carpet stretchers arrived two hours early, and we were far from done. So they headed to some other jobs and came back at the end of the day. That means a panicked Faith hid somewhere all day and under my bed once they were gone.

Faith stayed there most of Saturday, and I don't think she slept much those two days.

By Saturday night, she'd lost half a pound, looked ghastly, and received her first treatment of at-home fluids.

I worked through the weekend, so she and I hung out together. She didn't eat or drink much, but she did rest her face in the water bowl.

We decided to cancel my PT for Monday, give Tiny's vaccination appointment to Faith, and do whatever we needed to do to address the issue.

That brings us to last night.

At ten o'clock, Faith suddently discovered water.

And kibbles.

And sticks of wet food (the lickable snacks, and she eats an average of ten per day as a supplement).

Well, she ate eight of them last night.

I dozed on the bed and refilled her bowl each time I heard her licking the empty bowl. Untill well past midnight, I was up and down refilling her bowl. I also gave her fresh water around four.

She's still a little dehydrated. But her veterinarian said no more subcutaneous fluids until her next scheduled one, since she's eating and drinking. She also doesn't need to be seen, hurray!

We get that Faith is on borrowed time, and her situation can change on a dime. Her four-year anniversary since diagnosis is less than two months away, and we'd be surprised if she makes that.

In the meantime...

Tiny is rescheduled for next week. I get to go to work and PT as if nothing happened. 

Faith is currently hanging out under the bed pecking and food and water.

Not bad for a Monday, right?

Allergic Reaction: Yes or No?

Anyone who's wandered into the unicorn patch of health issues knows diagnoses are rather murky things sometimes.

Now that I finally have an antibiotic I tolerate well and treats TWO of my conditions, said antibiotic may have bitten back.

The problem is that the symptoms resemble an extreme reaction of autoimmune hives, which are with me always. Yes, my body is allergic to itself, too.

The symptoms started forty-eight hours after I started the drug and resolved sevety-two hours after I finished it.

Of course, I finished it.

I checked in with my doctor's physician assistant forty-eight hours after I finished the drug, and she who wasn't sure if I were reacting to the drug either.

She said I'm already taking everything they would have given me anyway. But she prescribed a much stronger, very sedating antihistamine to add onto my other three plus anithistamines if I needed more symptoms relief. 

I wound up not needing it. But I have it on hand if I do.

She did not feel I needed drug allergy testing at this point, which can be another conversation for another time.

So for now I'm left with an unclear answer and no direction for the next time I need it for the second condition (I'm allergic to the other oral options).

But I will let the experts figure it out.

I guess the lesson here is that life is not always clear and clearcut.

That's why we have critical thinking.

That's why we have others to help us.

That's why we have faith.

So what came out the door - "The Lady or the Tiger?"

Happy Tuesday!

Three Faith-Filled Years

Three years ago today, our calico Faith was diagnosed with small cell lymphoma.

Side note: I took this photo of Faith (and the last two at the bottom) right before I posted this blog. The rest are from various times of her illness.

OK, now onto the blog!

At the time of her diagnosis, Faith was sick, weak, and recovering from nearly a weeklong hospital stay, aspiration pneumonia, the insertion of a feeding tube (which we never used, only flushed daily for several months), and rapid weight loss.

We were told she could live two years with cancer treatments if she tolerated them well. In the meantime, she went on palliative care: prednisolone, Vitamin B12, and Cerenia for nausea as needed, as well as two antibiotics.

Faith finished the antibiotics and then went back on a third when her feeding tube became infected.

As Faith recovered, we decided to forgo treatment and leave her on palliative care for several reasons.

1. All options of treatment were too expensive for us to consider - plus the cost of treating Faith for side effects. 

2. The recent illness had so traumatized Faith (who already had panic attacks during routine veterinarian check-ups) that we didn't want the rest of her life to be a cycle of chemotherapy, side effects, and trips to the vet for lots of blood draws and side effect treatments. So even if we had unlimited funds, we still would not have chosen cancer treatments.

3. Faith's quality of life was returning, and we wanted to keep it that way. We wanted good days (even if few in number) than lots of potentially miserable days.

I researched her cancer and learned a few things.

1. The range for life expectancy with treatment was one to three years.

2. The range for life expectancy with palliative care was two to three months.

3. I found one cat in the literature who lived a year on palliative care alone.

Naturally, we did not expect Faith to live through the summer.

But when she did, we did not expect Faith to see the holidays - or 2023. But she did.

We repeated these mantras in 2023, 2024, and at the beginning of 2025.

She's long lost the bloated steroid look and pounds.

Today, she's slightly 9.8 pounds.

We added Gabapentin for arthritis eighteen months ago. The Cerenia became a daily medication six months ago. Faith also gets an occasional Zofran. By upping her nausea medication, she really doesn't get dehydrated anymore.

Now she does look a little thin.

But she's also lost muscle mass because we have a corgi in the house, so she stays upstairs. It's been five months since she's ran up and down the stairs.

Faith also looks a little tired some days.

But she's now a seventeen-year-old cat with cancer. According to several cat sites. that makes Faith eight-four years old. Heck, if I were eighty-four with cancer, I'd look tired, too.

Faith's oncologist said Faith's case is unusual. They do have one cat in the practice that's lived seven years (so far) with small cell lymphoma. But he's a much younger cat, and he did have two years of chemotherapy, too.

How to celebrate?

Well, right now she's more interested in all the helicopters that have been flying overhead for the last few hours than in anything I can offer her.

What about treats?

She already gets all the treats she wants, so nothing special in that regard.

But maybe some extra hugs and pets today are in order - and gratefulness to God for three Faith-filled years.

The Blog I Didn't Write This Morning

 Good morning!

Last week I posted "The Blogs I Didn't Finish This Week" (which you can read here, since Blogger isn't letting me link to it).

And I am now following that up with "The Blog I Didn't Write This Morning."

I finished up an extremely busy month with six straight extremely busy work days, which also followed two family emergencies and other challenges thrown into the mix.

But June is behind us, July is before us, and a new set of opportunities is laid out ahead of us, including the opportunities to finish those drafts. 

Will one of those opportunities include a jump in the lake? We shall see! (Summer is not summer top me with lakes and swimming pools).

This morning, I'm enjoying the cooler weather before the temperatures soar upward again.

I'm thankful Faith is looking alert and relaxed after a few difficult days for her.

I'm excited for BryonySeries to be part of the Billie Limacher Bicentennial Park Theatre's Independence Celebration (details are here). 

I'm grateful to The Book Market in Crest Hill for our summer display and sale (again, details are here).

And I'm so appreciative to you, dear reader, for popping into this blog this morning. Wish me luck that I'm able to finish at least one of those drafts tonight.

Let's make this day an amazing day!

Happy Monday!

Leo Buscaglia on Risks

That First Sip of Coffee

There is nothing like that first sip of coffee when you've had to delay it for fasting bloodwork.

Even better than coffee, there is nothing like gathering with loved ones when you've had to delay that, too.

The journey to the coffee maker is long or short, depending where you choose to place it. And once we grab our cup, we think about that journey no more.

But what an exquisite experience to gather with people who are not together randomly and look back at the journey traveled together.

Happy Monday!

Faces of Faith: Part One

Faith is six weeks away from her two-year anniversary of her diagnosis of small cell lymphoma.

Many cats with diagnosis live two to three years when treated with chemotherapy, prednisolone, and vitamin B12.

For many reasons, we opted for palliative care only, understanding we would get two to three months instead. But except for the scare in November (when we actually scheduled her at-home euthanasia only to have her pull through an hour before the veterinarian arrived), Faith has continued to do well.

Here's half a dozen photos of Faith for you to enjoy today. Hope at least one makes you smile.

Happy Thursday!

A Faith-Filled Christmas

 In early October, the health of our fifteen-year-old calico Faith started declining.

After a short, intense, and very expensive health crisis, Faith was diagnosed with small cell lymphoma in early April 2022.

We opted for palliative care instead of treatment after she stabilized and after we had consulted with experts and our finances.

But Faith has continued to do well - until October. It was strange since her bloodwork was perfect. But we adjusted to the mindset she would not be with us for Thanksgiving and Christmas this year.

Her treatment was modified. But that didn't help. So we made a decision for humane euthanasia in the home.

An hour before the veterinarian arrived, Faith responded to her new care plan, and the euthanasia was canceled.

She has continued to do well and her weight had continued to climb, 10.9 when Rebekah weighed Faith a week ago. In fact, Faith is chomping away at her food bowl as I write these words.

Faith was with us for Thanksgiving. And she was with us for Christmas, too.

For that reason, I asked Rebekah to take a photo of us by the Christmas tree last night. 

Faith hates being held, although she will tolerate it for brief moments.

You'll see a much more relaxed photo of her beneath this one.

May your own holiday season be filled with faith, whatever "holiday" and "faith" mean to you.

She's such a ham for the camera!

A Paw on the Rainbow Bridge

I've coined a saying in our family that helps us make end-of-life decisions: does so-and-so have a paw on the Rainbow Bridge?

That term is actually based on a poem and is considered a euphemism for a pet heaven.

If the animal hasn't placed a paw on the Rainbow Bridge, we should continue supporting life. But if the animal has, our job is to make the passage as smooth as possible.

Well, Faith has placed a paw on the Rainbow Bridge.

And we are guiding her gently over the bridge later this morning.

She's a great cat who has lived up to her name, especially since she lived nearly twenty times longer than doctors predicted when we chose palliative care in the spring of 2022 over chemotherapy.

Cats with small cell lymphoma live just two to three months on prednisolone alone (I actually found one in the literature that lived twelve). We received nineteen and a half months, and she amazed those veterinarians involved in her care.

So please wish her safe and peaceful journey to the other side.

And finally...

Thank you for all the good thoughts you've sent up for her more than a year and a half.

I know they made a difference in extending her life to the miracle that she was...

...a beautiful calico named Faith.

Good Thoughts for Faith

When we opted not to treat Faith's small cell lymphoma with palliative care only, we did not expect her to live another nineteen months.

But Faith has lived up to her name, living a good kitty life for sixteen months more than anyone, including her veterinarians, expected. We were told two to three months, so we are more than grateful at the time we've had with her.

She's declined over the last month, although her bloodwork a few weeks ago was perfect. And she's had a rough few days. I took these photos last night, while I can still take photos of her.

She's still doing some kitty things.

In fact, she's cleaning herself as I write this.

She still wants to cuddle, but for more often and for shorter periods.

She still head butts on command, but those are weak.

She used to pose as soon as she saw the camera. Now she looks away and needs coaxing.

Now, she can still skedaddle when the vacuum cleaner turns on.

Still, just when we got her weight stable again, she's lost half a pound in a few days.

She's not eating, drinking, or sleeping much. She's hiding under the bed a lot.

We have a call into her oncologist. And I'll also be calling the veterinarian who did Frances' at-home euthanasia for an assessment.

We're not planning any extraordinary measures. But we want her comfortable for as many days as she has left and a gentle passage over the rainbow bridge.

Please send good thoughts for Faith.

Story Round-Up: Features in The Herald-News, July 1 to July 7

Good morning!

Today I have thirteen features and news stories to share with you today with more stories are coming. So be sure to check back on The Herald-News site: shawlocal.com/the-herald-news.

If you're a writer, want to be a writer, or know someone in the Will/Grundy counties area that fits that description, be sure to check out this event.  It's free but seating is limited and registration is required.

Also, WriteOn Joliet returned to the digital media center at the downtown branch of the Joliet Public Library this week continue editing the radio play we presented at the Billie Limacher Bicentennial Park Theatre in Joliet on April 22.

Also, if you missed that radio play the first time, you will have another opportunity at 10 a.m. Sept. 9 at the downtown branch of the Joliet Public Library. More on this later.

Not much as has changed in the BryonySeries world since I worked last week through the weekend and the holiday. I had lots of "life" catching up the last couple of days, although I did re-read through some of the projects-in-progress to get back into the mood for this weekend.

A quick recap:

House on Top of the Hill: Third book in the BryonySeries Limbo trilogy. I now have a good working draft of the entire book and two chapters that are ready for final edits.

Cornell Dyer and the Howls of Basketville: The next book in The Adventures of Cornell Dyer subseries is ready for production - after the Fourth of July. Rebekah will be traveling and then she's taking a few days off. We can't wait to release it into the hands of readers. 

You can find other titles in the series here. Timothy has not yet added our latest titles to the BryonySeries bookstore. But all titles are also on Amazon. 

Karla Joins In: The fourth book in The Girls of the BryonySeries series. Eight chapters are completed. I'm hoping to write the ninth on Sunday. But we shall see.

BryonySeries reference/guide book: Welcome to Munsonville: the People, Places, and Things of the BryonySeries. I'd love to have this one ready by the end of the year. Pecking slowly at it.

A Year of Shadows and Moonlight, of Gathering Blooms in the Woods: A rather unusual, poetic novella in the second person. Half of it is written and edited and another half is loosely written. Rebekah is also playing around with art for the cover. 

Rebekah is also slowly updating the BryonySeries YouTube and Pinterest accounts. And she' catching up with Kindles for some of the BryonySeries books. So do watch for those.

Now back to the stories. Simply click on the link of the story that looks interesting to you. Happy scrolling!

But before the stories, I have a list of additional resources and information. Please check them out, too.

Finally, if you'd like to find more kindness in your life, consider this book.

And have a great Friday!

RECIPE OF THE WEEK

Sue's Diner is a fictional restaurant in the fictional Munsonville that only exists in the BryonySeries.

Each Wednesday, we post a new recipe. The recipe is either featured in one of our cookbooks, will be featured in an upcoming cookbook, or is just an "extra" we want to share with you.

Check out the recipe here.

WRITERS

If you're a writer anywhere in the world, you're welcome to join WriteOn Joliet's Facebook page. We're based in Joliet, Illinois, but we love to meet and interact with writers outside our area, too.

If you'd like to officially join WriteOn Joliet, we have two tiers of dues and two ways to attend meetings. We also have a marketing arm that's getting longer every year. Check us out at writeonjoliet.com.

I also suggest this book: Little Book of Revision: A Checklist for Fiction Writers. It's exactly as it says. Each page some with one suggestion for revision. The rest of the page is blank, so you can add your own notes. All proceeds benefit WriteOn Joliet.

If you need editing or help with self-publishing, check out dmbaranunland.com.

ARTISTS

If you need an artist for a project, I offer these recommendations.

NEWSLETTERS

Sign up for The Munsonville Times by emailing us at bryonyseries@gmail.com. The newsletter still isn't official yet, so we don't have an actual link on the website - but we are working on it! 

SOCIAL MEDIA

Daily updates: I do post the briefs on Twitter during the week, so you're welcome to follow me at @Denise_Unland61.

BryonySeries stuff: I post curated content relating to the BryonySeries on Twitter at @BryonySeries and assorted related content at facebook.com/BryonySeries, youtube.com/user/BryonySeries, and themes of each book in the BryonySeries at pinterest.com/bryonyseries.

And of course, please follow the adventures of Bertrand the Mouse on Instagram at bertrand_bryonyseries.

BRYONYSERIES BOOKS

For books and more information about the series, visit bryonyseries.com.

BRYONYSERIES EVENTS

A full month of virtual events can be found at bryonyseries.com/calendar-of-events.

QUESTIONS

Email me at bryonyseries@gmail.com.

Thank you for reading The Herald-News. And for reading this blog. And if you've read (or plan to read) any of my books. Your support is greatly appreciated.

FEATURES

New Lenox radiation oncologist heals body and spirit: Dr. Anne McCall: ‘The first time I distributed communion, I started to cry’

Historic Wilmington movie theater builds community: The Mar Theatre in Wilmington is still a first-run movie theater 

Manhattan displays Moving Wall honoring service members who died in Vietnam: Those who served shouldn’t be forgotten, Moving Wall volunteer said

Fireworks near me in Will County for 2023 Fourth of July shows: Many Fourth of July events also include live entertainment 

5 tips for keeping pets safe this Fourth of July: Will County Animal Control urges residents to be proactive 

Joliet East H.S. alumni to host reunion on July 22: Admission is $5 

5-year-old girl drowns at Tinley Park water park

Bolingbrook police, FBI, investigate bank robbery

Orland Park man gets 8 years in prison for 2018 Crete shooting: The man knew the victim from prison

Joliet, Wilmington men plead guilty, are sentenced to burglary: The plea is part of an ongoing burglary case Illinois Attorney General Kwame Raoul announced in 2022

Joliet firefighters extinguish garage fire; no injuries reported: Residents left the house on their own 

5 Things to do in Will County: Boat Regatta Bash in Shorewood: Plus 4 more suggestions for enjoying your weekend.

Pets of the Week: July 3, 2023: Will County rescues have dogs and cats for adoption

Illustration by Matt Coundiff for "Visage"

We Walk With Faith (And Faith Walks With Us)

In just two weeks, it will be the one-year anniversary of Faith, my almost 15-year-old calico, suddenly becoming very will.

Over the first few weeks of 2022, we had noticed that she was spitting up more hairballs than usual and wondered if she'd lost a little weight, although her weight had inched up a little and she had a little to lose.

But the hairballs slightly concerned us. At the time, we were battling a series of family emergencies. Faith had to wait her turn on the list.

Then on day, she started vomiting repeatedly and she went to the top of the list. She wound up with fluids, special food to get her over the hump, and medication to stop the vomiting. Her bloodwork was normal.

Two days later she was in the hospital with severe dehydration, weight loss, and aspiration pneumonia. This time, she received a feeding tube, oxygen, endoscopic biopsy, and a diagnosis of small cell lymphoma.

She was one sick little kitty. As the medical bills escalated over that horrible week, we discussed all options, including humane euthanasia.

Then the miraculous occurred.

When Faith improved enough for visitors, the hospital wanted to train us to tube feed her. The training failed because Faith struggled to breathe without oxygen, especially after getting so excited to see me. She was whisked away, and we received a verbal lesson on tube feeding.

The next day, Faith had done a nearly complete turnaround.

Hospital staff said her oxygen levels improved dramatically after my visit and they were weaning her off oxygen. We went back up to the hospital and saw a very different, much more like Faith kitty.

The new plan was to wean her completely off oxygen over the next twenty-four hours and release her in a few days.

Faith actually never went back on the oxygen after my second visit and came home the very next day with two antibiotics, steroids for life, and anti-nausea medication. Vitamin B12 was added later, also for life.

We never tube-fed her either.

She was scrawny and still battling pneumonia. But we were told that if she ate and drank on her own, not to tube-feed her.

She did. So we didn't.

We did have to flush the tube every day and give one antibiotic by tube, a two-person job handled by Rebekah and me. When the tube became infected, another antibiotic was added.

And Faith kept improving.

The vet left the feeding tube in place because cats sometimes need it when they start chemotherapy. Over the next two months, we sought a couple of opinions, discussed ways to finance Faith's treatment, and debated the most humane plan for her.

In the meantime, Faith kept gaining weight and regaining her energy.

We eventually decided against chemotherapy and asked for a palliative care plan. We understood what that meant for Faith. It meant we would get two to three months with her. That's the best cats typically do on a steroids-only regime.

But Faith's health had normalized a bit. And that is what we wanted for the rest of her life, even if that life was shorter than we wanted. Faith is an extremely anxious cat when it comes to medical procedures. And we didn't want to fill what was left of her life with trauma and recovering from trauma.

However, it was Frances, our tabby, who wound up unexpectedly euthanized in August, not Faith. But we also understood Faith's time would come shortly afterward.

But it didn't.

We also understood Faith would not see the holidays.

She did.

We also understood Faith would not see 2023.

But she did.

Now Faith took a slight downturn when I flew out to North Carolina in mid-January to say goodbye to my father, who took a dramatic downturn one Tuesday morning when I was recovering from COVID. 

But with one vet trip and some extra fluids, Faith bounced back. We also learned her bloodwork was normal and that she needed to lose a pound.

Normal. Can you believe it?

Now, her ultrasound, when we schedule another one just to see the cancer progression, will not be normal. She has small small cell lymphoma and that is not going away.

But Faith, as one person commented on social media, is living up to her name.

And we hope she continues to live a good kitty life, however much life Faith has left in her journey.

On The Way

In January 2019, I started releasing Before The Blood, a five volume prequel to the original "drop of blood" trilogy in the BryonySeries.

This was a purposely unfinished novel made up of five interconnected unfinished novel.

At Rebekah's suggestion, I released the story in five parts: John Simons, Kellen Wechsler, Bryony Marseilles, Henry Matthews, and Bryony Simons.

And later, I also released Before The Blood in one volume with teeny tiny font.

Writing Before The Blood was an eight-year project since my fiction writing is confined to Friday nights, Saturdays, an at-home writing retreat once a year, and random free days here and there.

Let me stress that I worked on this novel nearly every single Friday night and Saturday for eight years.

So it's important to be organized and focused, with eyes on the goal, even if the goal is far away.

But it occurred to me one day as I was wrapping up the project that no future enjoyment could ever compare to the enjoyment I felt during the construction phase: conjuring up concepts, outlining, character and plot developments, worldbuilding, research, writing, editing, refining.

It's wonderful to set and reach goals, and I wouldn't recommend a life without them. 

But it's also wonderful to be so immersed in the process we lose track of everything else. 

I also wouldn't recommend a life without that, either.

So during this present at-home writing retreat, I certainly have goals to hit, or I won't get the project done in my pre-set time.

But I'm also having one heck of a good time - when I can remember to lose sight of that goal while I'm creating and simply create.

Most roads lead somewhere.

But traveling is fun, too.

Happy Tuesday!

Partially paralyzed Steve Saint falls on stage and proves a point about about dependency

Forget About Reaching The Top

About a decade, I listened to part of a TED talk someone shared with me.

The speaker was an author (can't recall her name), who'd found success (can't recall with what) and was speaking on that topic (sort of).

But her point was absolutely memorable. And it's something to ponder, especially if you've set any goals in your life.

By the way, it's good to set goals. Keep doing it.

However, she said that we spend so much focusing on the top of the mountain when most of our time is actually spent climbing that mountain - and then climbing back down.

Most of us don't mind the climb up if we feel the goal is attainable. We strive and push for the prize.

Yet the view at the top, however breathtaking and spectacular it must be, lasts for a short time. We then must descend the mountain.

And she said we forget to prepare for that descent.

In fact, for anyone who has outshone someone else (or even outshone yourself) must keep in mind someone else (sooner than you can possibly realize) will be faster, smarter, more succinct, etc.

We will spend most of our time in life on the journey up or the journey down.

We should strive, yes.

Nevertheless, we should also know where most of life happens.

The view there is pretty good, too.

Illustration by Christopher Gleason for "Staked!"

BryonySeries Throwback Thursday: The Upside of a Crisis

Stumbled upon this post from two years ago...

Tuesday, August 14, 2018

The Upside of a Crisis

Lately, I've been sifting through the drafts folder of this blog, looking at posts partly begun or, more the case, studying titles that are nothing more than titles and wondering about my intent.

This is one I titled on Oct. 14, 2010. And the other day, I stumbled upon this Bible verse:

 "Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls,  yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation." Habakkuk 3:17-18

I can't say exactly what I intended to write that day. But I can certainly guess...and perhaps guess why this post was never written.

In August of that month, I had my eighth surgery (I've had six C/sections, one adrenalectomy, and the eighth to repair damage from the other seven). Recovery was fine for a couple weeks and then I had a HUGE flareup of hives (I've had chronic hives since 2002).

It sounds simple, but it wasn't. First of all, it's a chronic immune disorder, and I can't describe how awful the combinations of chemicals being released in one's body feels. I remember a nurse at one point taking my blood pressure and backing off a bit, because she could "feel" them.

A couple different medications were added to the regime. My body reacted pretty badly to them, and they didn't help the hives. Right around Oct. 14, could even have been Oct. 14, in the late afternoon, my doctor decided to hospitalize me.

I called my husband to tell him, and he said he was just going to call me. He had lost his job. And he wasn't laid off.

His job was half our income. And our insurance would be gone in two weeks. We had two weeks to figure out my health issue (which took another two months). He never did get another job; and we eventually lost the house his parents had built.

  

We've done a lot of rebuilding since then.

But during that time, when our fig tree didn't blossom, and we didn't have fruit on our vines, and the produce of everything we had built on that property (including the places we remodeled and added to accommodate a youth group we ran for four years) stopped yielding, and our fields (and sometimes our cupboards and refrigerator) had little food, and we were cut off from our folds, and our herd of cats went to live in a small apartment, we never NOT rejoiced in the Lord.

Some days, rejoicing in the Lord was all we had to rejoice in.

We...I...didn't think about it that way at the time. It was a dark time. I remember telling one son how good God was to prepare us for death by giving us little deaths and losses along the way...

But seeing this verse brought that time to my attention in a particular way. Even when everything (and everyone) else fails us, we can still in the Lord, we can take joy in the God of our salvation.

That is the upside of a crisis.

Illustration by Matt Counfiff for "Visage."

The Best Post You'll Read All Week

Ever have one of those moments when the Holy Spirit appears to tap you on the shoulder?

I had one last week in the middle of an extremely busy afternoon on deadline. Immediately, I laid aside my other work and followed up on it.

I picked up the phone and called six black male pastors I had interviewed over the years and asked them one question: What are your thoughts regarding the death of George Floyd and the events that followed?

Four picked up the phone right away and talked a lot. Some talked loudly, some talked rapidly, some chose his words very carefully, not in any sort of political correctness way, but because, and I could hear it in his voice, think about the best way to express what he was thinking and feeling.

One called me back and set up a time to talk the following morning. And he talked for over an hour, which turned into a bit of dialogue between us

One never called back, although, to be fair, I didn't leave the question on the voice mail, just a requst to call me back.

Why did I call them?

Because they are leaders in their church communities and will have to continue addressing this issue, so I knew they could communicate the sentiments well for the readers.

Because they are objective enough to see all sides.

Because they are both rational and spiritual.

Because racism affects their lives and the lives of people they know.

And because since everyone seems to have something to say right now, I felt somebody ought to ask them what they thought.

Here are the responses, which, instead of one story, turned into five.


‘Truth will get you into trouble; truth will get you killed’
Joliet pastor challenges people to listen to each other

https://www.theherald-news.com/2020/06/07/truth-will-get-you-into-trouble-truth-will-get-you-killed/a9ljyp0/


'I have never gotten so frustrated that I felt like burning down Target'
Will County Board member says two wrongs don’t make a right

https://www.theherald-news.com/2020/06/02/i-have-never-gotten-so-frustrated-that-i-felt-like-burning-down-target/ajk1yux/


'At the end of the day, we're all broken people, right?'
#Joliet pastor says people need to take responsibility for racism

https://www.theherald-news.com/2020/06/05/at-the-end-of-the-day-were-all-broken-people-right/agucfft/


'Black people have been in an unhealthy domestic abuse relationship with America'
#Joliet pastor said the oppressors need to fix the problem

https://www.theherald-news.com/2020/06/04/black-people-have-been-in-an-unhealthy-domestic-abuse-relationship-with-america/aov3ksg/


'It's kind of like open season on the African American male'
Clergyman says real issue is flaw in judicial system

https://www.theherald-news.com/2020/06/02/its-kind-of-like-open-season-on-the-african-american-male/awfyaai/

Illustration by Matt Coundiff for "Visage."

Interestingly, this illustration occurs at the end of the book, which leads into the third book. "Staked! deals with the theme of righting wrongs.

BryonySeries Throwback Thursday: And the Cavalry Showed Up

Sunday, January 19, 2014

And the Cavalry Showed Up

For readers following my posts the last few months, you know the interesting challenges I've battled. Recently, the newspaper that accepts most of my freelance features articles was sold, and I prepared to say "good-bye" to a satisfying portion of my career.

I was hasty.

The new company hired me as the features editor for The Herald-News. I've been told about eighty percent of my job will focus on what I've already been doing, albeit no longer from an attic office with a cat sitting behind mind me (along with one sitting on my lap, another perched on my tower, and a fourth resting on top of my printer.

The other twenty percent involves learning new equipment and software (Remember, I need directions to operate a can opener) and negotiating what it means to be a salaried employee with an assistant (other than a minor child) that reports to me.

While the "congratulations" from family, friends, co-workers, and fans is much appreciated, I'm honestly feeling more stretched than exhilarated, at least right now, as I struggle to learn much unfamiliar material in a short period of time, so I can quickly regain efficiency.

However, I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm very excited about this new trail of the journey. I love my job, and I'm thrilled that I can continue the old ways while expanding on them by learning new methods to get the task done while acquiring new skills.

Becoming an employee happened at the ideal time. I graduated from my homeschool teacher status in November when my youngest turned eighteen and earned his G.E.D.

Each of my children simultaneously began new adventures in their lives, too. Truly gives new meaning to the phrase "no child left behind."

Apparently, that must mean moms, too.

'Night.

Illustration by Christopher Gleason for "Staked!" Follow him at artworkbytopher.com.